The book entitled “She’s Come Undone” written by Wally Lamb is a realistic fiction novel published in 1992. Lamb’s excellence in writing is evident in this debut novel based on how he wrote it as if it was written directly from a woman’s perspective. As this novel is a coming-of-age story about a woman named Dolores Price, Lamb examines imbalanced power dynamics within relationships, intergenerational trauma and healing, the loss of innocence, and body image and self-worth. By analyzing this novel through reader-response criticism, each scene resonates deeply with my perspectives. I found myself reflecting on my own experiences and emotions while reading about Dolores Price’s journey from childhood through adulthood. This book gave me the solace I did not think I needed; therefore, it is indeed a breather in this chaotic world.
At first, the novel’s description piqued my curiosity, however after I got into the story, I found myself more interested than I thought I would be. Most people say life is like a rollercoaster ride, full of ups and downs. Dolores Price’s journey is indeed a rollercoaster ride. It was an emotional rollercoaster. The story starts with a 4-year-old Dolores Price, full of innocence and naivety, not knowing that the television set will start her clamorous journey of becoming “undone.” Dolores’ early life felt unsettling yet familiar. This television set was a gift from Mrs. Masicotte, the lady her father, Tony, works for as a property manager. Her father, Tony, was a narcissistic, charismatic, but unreliable person in the story. Her mother, Bernice Holland, for me, was like a fragile glass on the table that I wanted to hold on to as I witnessed her role in the story. Dolores usually comes with her father to Mrs. Masicotte’s residence and plays with her cocker spaniel named Zahra while waiting for her father’s private meeting to end. She was just like every other girl, she played with paper dolls, pulled pranks, was stubborn, and of course, she was a girl full of innocence.
Reading about Dolores’ childhood struck a chord with me and made me feel heartbroken. One of the most significant events in her life happened when she witnessed how her parents’ marriage began to fail. It all began when her mother had a miscarriage, and everyone was in deep devastation. According to the National Institutes of Health (NIH), the risks of experiencing depression and anxiety are higher in women after having a miscarriage. This supports the idea of how her mother became fragile throughout the story. Her mother had different ways of coping with her grief and eventually found solace through a parakeet named Petey and watching television. She replaced her dead son with Petey, which made Dolores jealous, but after Petey died, her mother had a nervous breakdown. Eventually, her parents’ marriage ended in a divorce due to her father’s infidelity. One scene in the early parts of the story had an impact on me. It was when Dolores had a conversation with her mother about her father being mean after witnessing their argument. Dolores’s statement was “Is Daddy mean?” which shows how family arguments affect the child’s mind. It is where sugarcoating or gaslighting is very evident because our parents want to stay strong for us and keep us from the sad reality we are living in. Her father’s infidelity and her mother’s emotional instability felt like she was carrying heavy weights on her young shoulders. Moreover, one must not settle for a love that kills them. As Dolores’ father becomes an abusive cheater, their life begins to shamble. This part left me with a thought about how important trust and faith in a relationship is, it is not just love or the sparks that work to bind your relationship, but it is the trust and faith that serve as a foundation of a long-lasting love.
When I read about Dolores witnessing her parents’ divorce, I felt a knot in my stomach. As a child of solo parents, I never saw nor knew who my father was. At that moment, I had the same feeling as Dolores—confused and abandoned. Even though I was raised alone, my mother did not fail to make me feel complete and loved. According to the book of Cummings and Davies entitled “Marital Conflict and Children: An Emotional Security Perspective,” most children who were raised in a destructive environment full of conflicts like verbal and physical aggression, silent tactics, and capitulation were possible to have problems in forming and maintaining healthy, balanced relationships with others. Another study by Sutherland (2014), states that some research says that even at an early age of six months, children show distress when their parents fight, which might put them at a higher risk of experiencing mental health problems. Moreover, children from high-conflict homes are more prone to externalizing or internalizing distress, leading to poor interpersonal skills and negative views of relationships, which can negatively impact their relationships throughout their lives and create a cycle of conflict across generations. It was very evident in Dolores’ struggles as she grew up having trust issues and problems connected with others she encountered along the way.
After her parents’ divorce, Dolores moves in with her strict grandmother named Thelma Holland in Rhode Island. Her mother ended up going to a psychiatric hospital, and after some time, she lived with them as well. Some parts of the story show evidence of how Dolores does not like her grandmother. This part reminded me of the circumstances my mother and I are currently in, as we are living with my grandmother as well. Just like how Dolores sees her grandmother as someone who is strict and complains all the time, I found it funny as well because I somehow see my grandmother like that sometimes, but I get how she does it for my own sake. These scenes made me remember the important role of my grandmother in my life. Her valuable lessons made me the person I am today. It made me realize how important it is to have support, whether it is emotional, financial, or other kind of support growing up.
Reading one of the heaviest parts of the story made me feel a lot of emotions. It started when Jack Speight moved with his wife, Rita, into his grandmother’s third-floor apartment. He is described in the story as a tall, blonde, disc jockey that everyone falls for, including Ma (Dolores’ mother), Dolores, and even Grandma. As the story progresses, things get weird so quickly. The scenes involving Jack Speight are among the most disturbing in the novel, as Dolores becomes a victim of his cruel behavior. At the age of thirteen, Jack Speight committed a horrible crime involving Dolores. Dolores suffered assault as she was raped by someone she trusted. There was evident foreshadowing before the crime happened, Jack’s grooming and manipulative behavior started when he gave Dolores rides in his car and he repeatedly asks if she is good at keeping secrets, which implies his desire to get away with his crime and avoid being caught. Eventually, he is gone in the story after Dolores tells Roberta about what happened. So, Jack usually tickles her feet, and after that situation in her life, whenever someone else touches her feet, it gives her post-traumatic stress disorder. According to the National Institute of Mental Health, anyone can develop PTSD at any age, especially those who have experienced or witnessed a very traumatizing event like physical or sexual assault, abuse, an accident, a disaster, a terror attack, or other serious events in the victim’s life. So, one of the symptoms is called “re-experiencing symptoms,” and in terms of Dolores’ experience, it is triggered by flashbacks and eventually when someone tickles her feet. Even if he left, what he did to Dolores would surely scare her for the rest of her life.
As a person who has a friend who experienced sexual assault, this part of the story opened my eyes to how harmful violence is. It made me feel a lot of emotions, especially that it portrays the society we are currently living in based on how Dolores went through disbelief and victim-blaming. Based on Illinois Coalition Against Sexual Assault (ICASA), this type of rape is referred to as “acquaintance rape,” this type of rape is committed by someone who is “acquainted” with the victim. It could be a friend, relative, or even neighbor, like Jack Speight. According to statistics found by ICASA, more than 70% of rape victims knew their perpetrator, which is very alarming, especially in this generation we are currently living in. Furthermore, many researchers have stated the lifelong impact of trauma, including the struggles that were painfully evident in Dolores’ journey.
After that horrific crime, Dolores’ teenage years were filled with loneliness and struggles, which I could really feel while reading. Ma, Dolores’ mother, bought her tons of food and a new television as a way of coping, which in fact is not the healthiest and best way to deal with what was happening. The way she coped with her problems is similar to mine. Whenever I feel stressed or emotional, I always eat and binge-watch Korean dramas. This is the start of Dolores’ struggles with her body image since she gained weight to over 250 pounds and became somehow isolated. According to the Mayo Clinic, emotional eating, or what people call “stress eating,” is a common response to suppress or remove negative emotions. It is a way to escape the reality that brings her stress, sadness, and fear. The reason why we eat when we are stressed is stated by Johns Hopkins Medicine, it is because the body releases a hormone that helps the body to protect itself, called cortisol. With what happened to Dolores, her cortisol levels may be elevated for a long period of time especially because of the traumatizing impact it caused her, as it can lead to increased food consumption, fat storage, and weight gain. “Mine is a story of craving,” are the words she said at the end of chapter one, indeed was true in this part. Moreover, as a teenager, growing up I experienced a lot of judgment that led my insecurity and mental health to deteriorate. I heard hurtful words I wished I had not even heard. At first, I tried to ignore them, but in the end, I ended up succumbing to the walls of insecurity that affected my confidence and view of myself.
I disliked how Dolores’ mother did not have the urge to take her to get counseling or even call the police, because her addiction to food and television led her insecurity to grow. An underlying message was seen in that part as the mother wants to imply that Dolores needs to shut up and deal with her pain, stuffing her face with lots of Cheetos and chocolates as if it will fill the gaps inside of her. According to the United States Department of Veterans Affairs National Center for PTSD, early treatment is better because the symptoms of PTSD may get worse over time, and dealing with it immediately can prevent it from worsening and help the victim move forward with a better quality of life. I agree with this because one must be able to have a support system and helping them go to treatment is another form of love—a love that can help you heal and grow in spite of what life throws at you. There are people like Dolores’ mother, which is said to be common, but these can be classified as “barriers” or things that might stop the victim from seeking help.
As Dolores’ life transitions to young adulthood, her mother died due to a tollbooth accident, and yes, she was once again in a state of grieving. As every person would react, Dolores wished that somehow the driver of the truck was not sleepy at all. At this time, her grandmother lost another child, and she cleaned and remodeled the house as a way of coping with her grief. Everyone has their own way of coping, and coping is a very important stage to reach acceptance. The idea of this kind of coping mechanism relates to the process of coping with grief called “grief cleaning.” According to Dr. Stern, grief cleaning, also known as grief decluttering, is a challenging and emotional process of letting go of the memories of physical possessions of a deceased loved one, creating space for new beginnings.
After everything has happened, she goes to college, where she steals her roommate’s letter from her boyfriend, Dante. Mr. Pucci, Dolores’ high school guidance counselor, was the one who convinced Ma to get Dolores to college. When she arrived at college, she was hated by her roommate named Kippy, who had a boyfriend that was later linked with Dolores in the story, slowly falling in love with this boy she had never met. As time goes by, Kippy breaks up with Dante and now has a new relationship with Eric, better described as the hypersexual drug-abusing frat boy. In the latter part of the story, Dolores once again experiences a traumatizing moment in her life, as if everything was on the verge of falling after rising. Eric assaulted Dolores at a party, and as a response, she kicked him and ran away to Dottie, the janitor at her school who befriended her. Having an intimate moment with Dottie, Dolores is determined to not be a lesbian, and fast forward, she kills Dottie’s fish and runs away again to Cape Cod. She called her mother’s best friend, Geneva, and checked herself into a motel. With that, Dolores dropped out of school after that horrific situation.
The next scene is one of the most controversial parts of the story. The scene where Dolores tries to take her own life was a saddening moment. She was found by the cops alongside a beached whale, drowning herself and hoping to die. With everything that has happened in her life, her suicidal thoughts may be explained by some studies that say that people with PTSD have a higher risk of suicide because of distressing trauma memories, anger, and poor control of impulses. In life, most of us experience our shortcomings which are inevitable. It is very important to seek support in times of this. As a person and a friend to others, I always try to make sure that I can give them the support and comfort they need. I want them to know that even if the world is cruel to them, there will be always someone they can lean on. Even though I cannot remove the pain they are experiencing, I may be able to ease it by listening and comforting them with words and hugs. We all get tired sometimes, and from this moment, my realization of life has deepened further. Like what most people say, “Small things matter,” a simple “How are you?” can make a complete difference in one’s life, emphasizing how small things make a big difference.
On that note, she went to a mental institution and was rehabilitated after seven years with the help of Dr. Shaw, her therapist. As she got out of the mental institution, she found Dante’s address and moved across the hall from him. As their relationship moved forward, she was pregnant because she lied about being on the pill. And with that, Dante wants her to get an abortion, later on, Dolores does get an abortion and sooner gets tied to the knot. Little did she know that Dante was not the nicest guy at all. Infidelity once again was the talk of the town, and it turns out that Dante cheated on her and abused her as well, reminding her of her father and mother when she was young. A study by Akcan et al. (2024) about the effects of the father’s infidelity states that daughters tend to replicate similar patterns in their romantic relationships as those in their family of origin, supporting the idea that this kind of daughters like Dolores model or mirror their mothers and foster a similar relationship with partners like their fathers. Furthermore, their fathers’ affairs lead to intergenerational trauma transmission for these women. It is very ironic that some end up in the same situation with their mother despite witnessing a divorce first-hand.
In the end, they get a divorce, her grandmother dies, and Dolores moves into her house all by herself. She started afresh and started to befriend people in their town like Roberta. As the story progresses, she goes back to school and meets Thayer Kitchen, developing an on-and-off relationship, which they decide to keep “on” forever. As the story comes to an end, Dolores has found the peace and love she was yearning for. They say that true love does wait, and I was captivated by how Thayer showed her love for Dolores. “This would not be your marriage to [Dante]. This would be our marriage.” These words struck me as if it was fate that led him to drop right into Dolores’ lap. For me, I realized that love should not be forced and rushed, thus, it should be a slow, burning, genuine love that feels like a glimpse of paradise. We should know our worth and not settle for less than what we deserve, like how Thayer treated Dolores with kindness and reassurance instead of betrayal and the threat of a fist like pretty much every other man that has come into her life. I learned how beautiful and powerful love is, that you can see right through one person and be ready to commit to them. Their story was a note-worthy love story, even if it was such a short time when Thayer came into the picture. Moreover, fate is truly powerful, as a significant coincidence happens to them when Dolores leaves the institution, she draws him for her psychic and says that he looks like the man who is going to be Dolores’ husband someday. The story ends as Thayer takes Dolores on a whale watch, and she gets to see one up close.
Her journey of embracing a new life and loving herself was a proud moment for me. I felt like the little Dolores would be much prouder of how far she had come. It was something noteworthy and watching her grow into someone who loves and accepts herself was inspiring. And that is where Dolores finally comes un-undone.
The whole story captivated me and made me reflect and realize a lot of things in life. There are a lot of scenarios where I can see myself as Dolores, despite being in a different situation, I can feel it as if I was the one in her shoes. I truly admired how Lamb wrote this because he is a man, and how he narrated Dolores Price’s life was something that made his style unique and beautiful. It felt like she was my childhood friend, and growing up with her made me learn a lot of valuable lessons in life. It was depicted that she sees herself like a whale, signifying a lot of things like how a whale swims forward by flexing their tails up and down, instead of side to side that most of the fish do. This up-and-down movement is called “breaching,” and it symbolizes the ups and downs of life that are inevitable and that we must continue to face to live, like how a whale does because in order to survive they need to swim. I noticed on the book cover as well a woman’s face surrounded by clouds above the water, which is very relatable to that one scene where she is seen drowning. It was quoted as a book that is an ambitious, often stirring, and hilarious book indeed. There were scenes that made me laugh, touched, sad, frustrated, and even speechless. I liked how it resonates with what is happening in our current society, where controversial or sensitive topics are taken into account, like trauma, mental health, and even death, as it was evident with the novel’s use of themes. It truly is a realistic novel that portrays the life of a woman who taught readers how to become the best version of themselves despite their background and imperfections.
As a reader, I can understand how the characters act upon the situations they are facing. It felt very realistic, so raw, that it was something imperfect yet perfect at the same time. If I were in a similar situation, I believe that I would hope to seek help sooner rather than later. Her journey taught me the importance of reaching out and how important it is to be surrounded by people who can help her grow and be better. It does not mean that a person is weak when they seek therapy. For me, it shows how strong a person is to face their battles and how they want to make their lives better. Validating one’s own feelings is a sign of love and helping them heal and grow at the same time is one of the most beautiful images that love can give us. I admire the characters for their strength to fight what life throws at them even if some of the characters come as lessons in their lives, I believe that those kinds of persons are one of the people we should be thankful for. Even if they left a scar, we learned something that we can use to combat life’s challenges.
I believe this novel is intended for everyone because each one of us experiences different kinds of challenges in life. Well, specifically, it speaks more about people who have experienced trauma, mental health struggles, or even body issues. It is very relatable and inspiring as it addresses themes that deeply resonate with the nature of life.
As I read the story, I was reminded of the homily by Father Nathaniel Pamplona about tough love. The characters’ situation showed how tough it was to love and to give love to people who hurt you. I also remembered how my philosophy teacher, Sir Nabil Marquez, spoke about how life is a series of transitions, and I truly agree with that. The story revolves around a transition of happiness, loss, traumatizing experiences that made the character stronger, forgiveness, and a definition of what love is, may it be a love that comes within us or from others. It made me remember the things I am passionate about—serving God and others. I want to be a light to everyone, especially people like Dolores; I want to be someone’s purpose. “She’s Come Undone” is a beautiful story that will always stay in my heart, and that being “undone” signifies a new beginning where love, growth, and happiness will conquer.